Thursday, 29 December 2011
Trainspotting
What a film, honestly!! I bow down to your greatness Mr Boyle.
Surprisingly similar to Slumdog Millionaire, eg the toilet scene etc.
Im glad I miss out on things, to have watched this, I couldn't see a better time.
Wednesday, 28 December 2011
Kuu
Eile nägin ma Kuud. Olen ennegi kas täis- või poolkuud vaadanud ja vahel ka siis, kui ta päikselisel päeval valgena ikkagi paistab. Tulin töölt uksest välja, oli juba pimedaks läinud, ning mu ees taevas oli väga ilus selgepiiriline kuusirp, algul. Ja siis nägin, et sirbi taga oli terve Kuu, ta üks külg oli lihtsalt valgustatud. Taevas oli tumesinine, aga Kuu oli pigem pruunikas ja mitte enam ühetasandiline sära, mida ma siiani näinud olin. Ma tundsin, kuidas Kuu on tõesti meiega ja tiirleb ümber Maa ning olin talle lausa tänulik. Kõndisin terve tee vaadates ja nähes Kuud, absoluutselt võlutud, kuni ta K-Rauta sildi taha peitu läks.
Sunday, 25 December 2011
Christmas lifestyle special
“Drive it like you stole it”, The Glitch Mob.
“Fish, booze and chocolate”, Mari Valdur
"Aaria" Eino Tamberg
This Christmas was supposed to be unbearable as my sister, my dearest of all, was away for Christmas the first time and there was no proper snow to look at. Also, I couldn’t ask friends over because I was very lazy last week and wanted to go back to the city soon after holiday to actually get some work done. Hence I came up with a plan how to make these couple of most touching days of the year less dramatic and mentally challenging. Of course I could have gone for the healthy balanced solution but as I was becoming more and more sad I gave myself a right for an easy way out. There are some points that became rules over these days, which will probably help in case my sister being away is the new family tradition. I have adapted.
1. Drink all the alcohol offered. Show initiative to get more. Do not act drunk or you will not get more, this is not a flat party.
2. Try to gain 2 kg and do everything to achieve this during these limited days. This makes eating Christmas food so much more meaningful and guilt free. Eat all the chocolates around. If you’re a vegetarian become a passionate pescaterian for the time being.
3. If an idea of loneliness or holiday related depression kicks in, go back to the basics: this is a meaningless religious commercial holiday.
4. If you now come to claim that this is just a beautiful time that should not be ruined by this or that come to think of all the poor poor children who are waiting for a Santa to arrive but the man never does. So they go to bed feeling empty for Christmas being over, hoping that the year will past quick as hopefull Santa will come around next time. But let me tell you, Santa won’t. So you’ll feel so sad for these children that your own problems seem much smaller as you’re a grown-up and stronger. Now the feeling of being stronger should properly take over and you should feel just furious for all the injustice and hurt in the world. There is no space left for Christmas gloom.
Day 1.
On Friday I got up, watched series, did the dishes and took a train from Tallinn to Türi. This was in the afternoon and it was getting dark. On the side of the rails I saw two huge moose, they seemed so fagile carrying their huge bodies in confusion toward the white line of birch trees. My Mum came to pick my brother and me up, we got vitamins, honey and coffee for my great aunt to whose birthday we were heading shortly. It was a joint one with my Gran, my Gran turning 75 and auntie Vaike 80. They looked fabulous and gave me huge loving hugs. There were many relatives and once the band started playing, most of them took off to the dance floor to shake it from the bottom of their heart.

My Gran at her party. Photo Signe Jäetma

My Gran hugging Santa, Koidula and Jakobson watching. Photo Signe Jäetma
Around 3pm I entered the drink-n-eat shuffle
8 blueberry cupcakes
1 glass of champagne
Fruit
1 boiled potato
2 pieces of herring in sour cream sauce
3 slices of Gran’s bread
1 glass of champagne
2 pieces of fish in tomato sauce
Fruit
1 glass of champagne
2 shots of cranberry liquor
1 glass of champagne
1 shot of cranberry liquor
2 pieces of Gran’s bread
1 plate of fish in tomato sauce
1 glasses of champagne
7 chocolate truffles
1 piece of cake
3 chocolates
(missed red wine, homemade beer!! and various booze offered to me while I was having the cake and was too distracted and inarticulate)
Day 2.
8 pancakes with cream cheese and blackcurrant jam
1 cup of tea
6 chocolates
3 tursamaks salad sandwiches
½ blackcurrant liquor shot
4 chocolates
2 glasses of champagne
2 pieces of salmon with pumpkin and 2 potatoes
4 tursamaks salad sandwiches
2 chocolates
1 glass of champagne
1 chocolate
(now decided to eat all the leftovers within a reach, which was not easy to do at this time of day)
1 piece of salmon
2 pieces of bread
4 tursamaks sandwiches
2 blueberry muffins
1 cranberry liquor shot
Day 3.
I slept til noon and opened my eyes at times to check if the sun was still shining. It really was. I did my daily (no so much daily yet) practice but all the fish, cream and alcohol had made my body very inflexible. Maybe it was the fact that my yoga mat was not there or that there was no support of other people’s presence, it was just so much harder than in the beginning of the week. However, I finished and realised this was the first time I had carried out the whole of my simplified practice at a location other than the yoga school. I’ve always wanted things to come to me quickly, right now and to the full extent. I rarely live up to achieving this and this brings discontent. Whenever I fall, it doesn’t matter whether I am becoming better overall or not, all that matters is to pick it up, forgive and carry on. No more fish, pointless booze or sweets for me for a while.
“Fish, booze and chocolate”, Mari Valdur
"Aaria" Eino Tamberg
This Christmas was supposed to be unbearable as my sister, my dearest of all, was away for Christmas the first time and there was no proper snow to look at. Also, I couldn’t ask friends over because I was very lazy last week and wanted to go back to the city soon after holiday to actually get some work done. Hence I came up with a plan how to make these couple of most touching days of the year less dramatic and mentally challenging. Of course I could have gone for the healthy balanced solution but as I was becoming more and more sad I gave myself a right for an easy way out. There are some points that became rules over these days, which will probably help in case my sister being away is the new family tradition. I have adapted.
1. Drink all the alcohol offered. Show initiative to get more. Do not act drunk or you will not get more, this is not a flat party.
2. Try to gain 2 kg and do everything to achieve this during these limited days. This makes eating Christmas food so much more meaningful and guilt free. Eat all the chocolates around. If you’re a vegetarian become a passionate pescaterian for the time being.
3. If an idea of loneliness or holiday related depression kicks in, go back to the basics: this is a meaningless religious commercial holiday.
4. If you now come to claim that this is just a beautiful time that should not be ruined by this or that come to think of all the poor poor children who are waiting for a Santa to arrive but the man never does. So they go to bed feeling empty for Christmas being over, hoping that the year will past quick as hopefull Santa will come around next time. But let me tell you, Santa won’t. So you’ll feel so sad for these children that your own problems seem much smaller as you’re a grown-up and stronger. Now the feeling of being stronger should properly take over and you should feel just furious for all the injustice and hurt in the world. There is no space left for Christmas gloom.
Day 1.
On Friday I got up, watched series, did the dishes and took a train from Tallinn to Türi. This was in the afternoon and it was getting dark. On the side of the rails I saw two huge moose, they seemed so fagile carrying their huge bodies in confusion toward the white line of birch trees. My Mum came to pick my brother and me up, we got vitamins, honey and coffee for my great aunt to whose birthday we were heading shortly. It was a joint one with my Gran, my Gran turning 75 and auntie Vaike 80. They looked fabulous and gave me huge loving hugs. There were many relatives and once the band started playing, most of them took off to the dance floor to shake it from the bottom of their heart.

My Gran at her party. Photo Signe Jäetma

My Gran hugging Santa, Koidula and Jakobson watching. Photo Signe Jäetma
Around 3pm I entered the drink-n-eat shuffle
8 blueberry cupcakes
1 glass of champagne
Fruit
1 boiled potato
2 pieces of herring in sour cream sauce
3 slices of Gran’s bread
1 glass of champagne
2 pieces of fish in tomato sauce
Fruit
1 glass of champagne
2 shots of cranberry liquor
1 glass of champagne
1 shot of cranberry liquor
2 pieces of Gran’s bread
1 plate of fish in tomato sauce
1 glasses of champagne
7 chocolate truffles
1 piece of cake
3 chocolates
(missed red wine, homemade beer!! and various booze offered to me while I was having the cake and was too distracted and inarticulate)
Day 2.
8 pancakes with cream cheese and blackcurrant jam
1 cup of tea
6 chocolates
3 tursamaks salad sandwiches
½ blackcurrant liquor shot
4 chocolates
2 glasses of champagne
2 pieces of salmon with pumpkin and 2 potatoes
4 tursamaks salad sandwiches
2 chocolates
1 glass of champagne
1 chocolate
(now decided to eat all the leftovers within a reach, which was not easy to do at this time of day)
1 piece of salmon
2 pieces of bread
4 tursamaks sandwiches
2 blueberry muffins
1 cranberry liquor shot
Day 3.
I slept til noon and opened my eyes at times to check if the sun was still shining. It really was. I did my daily (no so much daily yet) practice but all the fish, cream and alcohol had made my body very inflexible. Maybe it was the fact that my yoga mat was not there or that there was no support of other people’s presence, it was just so much harder than in the beginning of the week. However, I finished and realised this was the first time I had carried out the whole of my simplified practice at a location other than the yoga school. I’ve always wanted things to come to me quickly, right now and to the full extent. I rarely live up to achieving this and this brings discontent. Whenever I fall, it doesn’t matter whether I am becoming better overall or not, all that matters is to pick it up, forgive and carry on. No more fish, pointless booze or sweets for me for a while.
Sunday, 18 December 2011
Loeng muusikast ja kõigest

Ryan Mastro foto
Kuulasin täna Ööülikoolist potikildude pesemise kõrvale Kalev Rajangu loengut 'Muusika kodustamine ehk kus on muusika siis, kui teda parasjagu ei mängita'. See oli värskendav ja natuke isegi sümboolne, nagu kõik üldse vabalt olla võib, sest nendesse kontroriruumidesse, kus meie arheoloogiafirma hetkel resideerub, kolis mingi salvestusfirma. Sinna, kuhu ma kilde kuivama viisin, tuleb paari nädala pärast heliruum. Hetkel seal pole heli, vaid vaikus, hääl, mida teevad potikillud, mis olidki kunagi potid, pannid, kausid, kus tehti süüa, mis siis purunesid ning aastasadu aina tiheneva sodiga segunesid. Kaks meest ja üks naine seadsid kõrvaltuppa tehnikat üles. Mulle meeldis Rajangu jutt, mis oli pigem meeleharjutus ning mõnus kuulamine, kui tõepähe võetav õpetus. Kahju, et ta nii kiiresti rääkis, kuigi see oligi osaliselt see kirgastav element. Tundus, et tal on nii suur häda öelda intelligentseid asju, ehk rabada, ilma, et kuulaja võiks natuke enda ja temaga vahepeal dialoogi pidada. Aga kui selline loeng kirjutada ja ette lugeda, siis võib endale väikest loorberit ja ego-häälevõnget vist lubada küll ning ma ei pane talle seda sugugi pahaks. Kokkuvõttes olin temaga suuresti nõus, eks lääs ole jah mehelik ja obsessioonis kõige ja kõigi kodustamisest; Jumal ongi Tatataa või Lalalaa; jpm.
Tegelikult tahtsin vaid kirja panna ta mõnusa ümbesjutustuse Herman Hesse loost selle kohta, kuidas "terve kari heliloojaid rühib mingi mäe poole ja siis Richard Wagner ja Johannes Brahmsil on tohutu suured kartulikotid seljas ja nad on lausa nõrkenud. Ja siis see jutustaja annab teada, et mis seal kottides siis on, mispärast just Wagneril ja Brahmsil, aga siis öeldakse niimoodi, et nendes kottides on need noodid, mis jumaliku õigluse järgi on leitud nende heliteostes olevat üleliigsed. Ja see on niisugune tappev koorem nii Brahmsile kui Wagnerile eksole. No kujutame ette Arvo Pärti ja võib-olla mõnda teist minimalisti minemas mäest üles käed taskus, vile huulil."
See oli lihtsalt nii armas lugu, et pani mind südamest naerma. Muidugi soovitan seda loengut tervenisti kuulata, sest Rajangu räägib muhedamalt, kui mina trükin.
Siin http://heli.er.ee/helid/oy/OY2011_Kalev_Rajangu_Muusika_kodustamine.mp3
Sunday, 11 December 2011
Let Me Know Silver Swan
Unes olin ühes suures kandilises majas, käsipuud ja trepid, kõik pruunid ja tõsised. Ülemisel korrusel oli valgem ning paar teist inimestki, aga ikka tundsin peaksin alla lugemistuppa minema. Laed olid kõrged ning mul veidi jahe ja võõras. Siis võttis keegi minult käest kinni, ma ei tihkunud vaadata, kes see oli. Kõik sai soojust, julgust ja lihtsust täis. Majast eemale viis rohtunud lumine tee, raagus puude vahelt, seal sai kõndida, sealt sai minna.
Thursday, 8 December 2011
Kolde puiestee
Tippisin Kolde puiesteel tennistega lumelörtsis, kui kohtasin oma keskkooliaegset raamatutegelast. Nagu Tartus see juhtuks, hakkasin teisipäeva hämaruses kuulma skisofreenilist jutuvada. Tundus, et ta oli selle juba varem kirja pannud ja nüüd luges seda ette. Mehel oli muidugi seljas pigem laitmatu hall vihmamantel, käes mingi asjaliku sisuga kotid ja tundus 'et ta kuulub kellelegi', ta oli hoolitsetud. Puiestee kõnnitee oli pikk ja libe ja säras unenäoliselt. Rohkem kui Tartu, Tartu särabki muudkui ja enamasti unenäoliselt. Tallinnas on teisiti, piirid on selgemad, meretuul, ja ise valmismõeldud juhused ja unelmad saavad teoks pingutatult või mitte üldse. Aga kui ma seda meest nägin seal kindlas segaduses seismas ja rääkimas identiteedist ja vabariigist, süsteemidest, vaimuhaiglast, hoolimatusest ning loomingust, poisist, kes kojuminnes hoiab käes nuga ja sind selga pussitab, näis kogu see kõnnitee tema teadvuse, reaalsussena, "Protsessi" mingi kõrvalhetkena. Ta oli nagu kaua sahtlis kopitanud postkaart, mille saades tulid silme ette mälestused ühe vanaema juurest teise juurde, kodu kapid ja palju muud. Ma ei kartnud teda vaadelda, lausa uurida, seda specimeni, kes minu leksikoni järgi kuulutati surnuks või olematuks mitu aastat tagasi. Ma arvasin, et olin gümnaasiumis neid raamatuid täiesti valesti lugenud. Võitlesin tahtmisega temaga rääkida, aga just tol hetkel innustus ta poisi ja noa teemast, identiteediosa tuli siis, kui ma juba üle muru, üle lume teise tee otsa olin jõudnud, et ühte viiekorruselisse majja siseneda. Ta oli üle kõnnitee end minu poole suunanud ja rääkis edasi ja valjemini vist. Jäin veel korra seisma, kuulasin. Ta oli intelligentne inimene, kuigi ma tegelikult kahtlen, kas ta mind nägigi. Mul hakkas temast ja Juhan Liivist kahju.
Pärast, kui läksin tagasi, oli puiestee veel vaiksem, veel pimedam, veel libedam, veel pikem, aga meest enam polnud. Ta oli kuskile korterisse läinud ja elas nüüd seal.
Ma tean, et mu reaalsusel pole häda midagi, aga mind üllatab kui väga meenutab see auku sinises operatsioonipaberis, mida võib ühelt kohalt teisele nihutada ja siis urkida, aga kõik muu jääb ikka kaetuks (olen liiga palju Grey Anatoomiat järjest vaadanud), mis kurvem veel, mõne aja möödudes ununeb. Teisalt võib-olla ükskord saavad need vajalikud protseduurid tehtud ja katet pole enam vaja. Ja siis on normaalne kohtuda sellise mehega või Raua tänaval valele uksele koputades vesta natuke juttu valgeks mingitud kassinaisega. Ja palju muud.
Pärast, kui läksin tagasi, oli puiestee veel vaiksem, veel pimedam, veel libedam, veel pikem, aga meest enam polnud. Ta oli kuskile korterisse läinud ja elas nüüd seal.
Ma tean, et mu reaalsusel pole häda midagi, aga mind üllatab kui väga meenutab see auku sinises operatsioonipaberis, mida võib ühelt kohalt teisele nihutada ja siis urkida, aga kõik muu jääb ikka kaetuks (olen liiga palju Grey Anatoomiat järjest vaadanud), mis kurvem veel, mõne aja möödudes ununeb. Teisalt võib-olla ükskord saavad need vajalikud protseduurid tehtud ja katet pole enam vaja. Ja siis on normaalne kohtuda sellise mehega või Raua tänaval valele uksele koputades vesta natuke juttu valgeks mingitud kassinaisega. Ja palju muud.
Cassius
Laul pole suurem asi, nende 'I love you so' on samas päris hea. Nagu see video. Mix&match. Väike päikeseprill, vahemeretsill, flowyouknow.
Monday, 5 December 2011
Going green
If sustainability is about one thing, it’s survival. Probably the most famous story of all about survival appears in “One Thousand and One Nights”. Scheherazade volunteers to marry King Shahryar knowing it is his custom to take a virgin in marriage each night and kill her the next morning. She survives from one night to the next by telling stories that never quite finish. It’s her art that keeps her alive. But it does so in two ways. Night by night, story by story, she effects a change in the king’s cruel heart, awakening his imagination and sympathy. After a thousand and one nights, the king reveals his love for her. By surviving, Scheherazade shows that art not only reflects the world, it changes it too.
by Robert Butler http://moreintelligentlife.com/content/ideas/robert-butler/going-green
by Robert Butler http://moreintelligentlife.com/content/ideas/robert-butler/going-green
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